The Heroic Couple

Heroical love causeth Melancholy. His Pedigree, Power, and Extent.
- Robert Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy



I find it hard to answer, happily,
your happy questions: Would you like to see

my underwear? How long before we’re kissing?
So why do you insist on lace? You’re missing

the point. We’re in my parents’ house—well, yes,
I love that marks I’ve left haven’t left your breast,

but Honey, let me introduce my mother.
She’s charmed, I’m sure, I’ve finally found a lover,

but doesn’t need to know the games we play
with vegetables. No, please don’t cry. I’ll say

you’re gardening. She doesn’t have to know.
Just be careful. Next time, let it go:

when Father asks you if you like to cook,
just tell him Yes, don’t offer him a look

inside your goodie drawer. Of course he laughed!
He’s seen such things before; he isn’t daft.

But have some tact. He won’t stop asking where
I found you, if I picked you up. He stared

all evening down your blouse, winking each time
I caught him. Sugar, see? I’ll try to find

a way to put this nicely: he things you’re easy.
So if I say to be a lady, please be.

I know it’s hard to hide our lovely passions,
but Dear, my folks are tied to tamer fashions.